Several months before I graduated high school, I hopped on board the “what-am-I-supposed-to-do-with-my-life” train and declared a career path. My decision was based on success. I was longing for an identity that I could become. And I knew that I desired a life of success. So I laid out a perfect plan. I was going to go to nursing school, graduate with my BSN and RN, then work as a nurse while living in a downtown apartment with a cat. I didn’t have wishes to ever get married or start a family-both were too risky for my secure, controlled life. I was going to have a checking account with which I would pay for rent, utilities and school loans. My high school graduation purchase- a 2004 Volkswagon Passat, lovingly named Penny, was going to be my trusty ride for 20+ years so I would no longer have car payments and I would also have a savings account in which would pay for a lovely, relaxing vacation to the beach once a year. A vacation I would take alone, with my cat.
I never grew up with a cat so I do not really know the inspiration behind this loving, loyal pet cat. Well, other than the desire to model my life somewhat after Sandra Bullock’s character, Lucy in the film While You Were Sleeping. If you haven’t seen the movie, she lived alone in an apartment with a cat and devoted her life to her job. Well, until she fell in love but I was certain that wouldn’t happen to me.
But God had other plans for me.
He brought me to LeadHer where I discovered my passions, my calling and my purpose. Which did not include nursing school. And then He brought a guy into my life who swept me off a feet within a week of dating and I’ve been crazy in love ever since (like planning on marriage crazy…) and then God preceded to place me as a director within LeadHer- a job that I have no degree in, no experience in and no qualifications whatsoever.
My small size 7 feet just did not fit into the large shoes I was called to fill. And beyond that, the shoes were not the comfortable flats that I was accustomed to wearing. My clumsiness and lack of good balance has prevented the wearing of heels for most of my life, and I have just grown so comfortable in my small 5’2″ size that suddenly growing a few inches throws me way out of comfort zone. As I slid into my new role, I felt like I was sliding on a pair of 10 1/2 4″ heels. All I foresaw in my future was failure.
But where we often see failure, God sees success- His success.
It was not in my qualifications that God saw my worth, but in my willingness and obedience. It’s a theme that fills the pages of the Bible. Our worthy heroes all started out as unworthy dreamers with little feet.
David was a child who had never used a sword. Yet He was called to slay the giant.
Moses was a runaway who couldn’t speak. Yet He was called to deliver the people from Egypt.
Mary was an unwed teenager. Yet she was called to be the mother of Jesus.
Rahab was a prostitute. Yet she was called to protect and help the Israelites take over Jericho.
Our non-qualifications are perfect qualifications for serving in God’s army, because it is not our feet that fill the shoes, but His.
In fact, when Moses heard God through the burning bush- He was not told to slip on Holy shoes. He was told to take off his shoes.
So when the shoe doesn’t fit, take off the shoes and let God fill the shoes like only He can. And then be prepared to be used in a powerful way. Because when you stand shoeless on holy ground, there is no telling where God will lead you, how He will use you, and in what ways His glory will shine through you. You just might be called to Egypt- but take comfort in the fact that you will never go alone.